THE LAND OF THE SILENCED: The Ozzie Guillen Saga

I want to preserve any journalistic credibility (if there is such a thing on a blog) with a preface. I have been a lifelong White Sox fan. I love Ozzie Guillen. How could I not? Growing up a Sox fan, a World Series celebration seemed like nothing more than a pipe dream, a far-fetched musing of a young and naïve Chicago baseball fan. In 2005 my childhood dreams became a reality. In only Ozzie’s second year with the team, he along with general manager Kenny Williams, built something incredibly unique to Chicago baseball: a World Series Champion. Anchored by an amazing pitching staff and a small ball mentality which oddly enough still allowed the White Sox to lead Major League Baseball in home runs, the White Sox captured their first world championship in nearly 100 years. Chicago finally had a World Series champion again in what was one of the most dominant postseasons in the history of sports and we couldn't have been any more elated.

Ozzie Guillen became a Chicago hero, a legend, and it was incredibly fitting for a melting pot like Chicago. Chicago has a huge Latino population of nearly 1 million Latinos in the city alone. Before Ozzie our untouchable sports heroes included Bo hunk Mike Ditka and African American Michael Jordan, both of whom brought world titles to the city. No Latin American ever captured our hearts the way Ozzie did and Ozzie Guillen took his place in the pantheon of greatness representing what Chicago looks like today in the 21st Century, Hispanic. He was revered, some might even say adored.

Eventually the buzz wore off and Ozzie’s act wore thin with management. A bitter feud ensued between he and General Manager Kenny Williams. Still much of the fan base in Chicago loved their hero, even when he was unceremoniously fired by the Chicago White Sox last fall. To no one’s surprise he ended up in Miami where he was a coach for the Marlin’s last World Series run. Ozzie Guillen moved from being the manager of one Hispanic city’s baseball team to being the manager of another Hispanic city’s team.

Ozzie says a lot of things. Actually, that’s one of the characteristics I admire most about him. While in Chicago, he became infamous for praising socialist leader Hugo Chavez and attacking journalist Jay Marrioti’s sexuality. Ozzie has no filter. He never wears a free speech condom and truthfully what could be more American? Of course the Chicago sports media baited him into some of the most controversial sound bites of all time which was as entertaining as it was refreshing.

This isn’t to say I agree with everything or even understand most of what Ozzie says. I think he went over the line when he called former White Sox outfielder Magglio Ordonez a Venezuelan piece of excrement. Attacking Jay Marriotti based on the grounds of sexual orientation was also out of bounds and way below the belt. Although I don’t agree with everything Ozzie says, I steadfastly support his right to say it. What kind of American would I be if I didn’t?

This brings us to Ozzie’s most recent controversy where he praised unpopular Cuban dictator Fidel Castro for his staying power. Ozzie said that he admired Castro’s longevity and pointed out that people have wanted to kill Castro for sixty years and had only been unsuccessful in their attempts. As one can imagine, this started a firestorm in the heavily Cuban populated area of Miami. Cuban groups gathered to form protests and boycotts offering a seemingly uniform voice in their distaste and displeasure for the Manager’s controversial remarks. I admire the Cubans utilizing their free speech rights in the one country on Earth that is supposed to value them. Still, I couldn’t help but notice the hypocrisy of such a massive protest against an individual who utilized the same freedoms Cubans had so cruelly been stripped of under Castro. In an odd twist of fate, the Cubans had become more like Castro than they probably ever imagined possible and more like him than they would ever like to admit. They wanted Ozzie suspended. No, they wanted Ozzie fired. No they wanted Ozzie’s blood. No, they wanted Ozzie silenced for good. Politicians and local business owners lined up to do their usual pandering and cow towing to the local Cuban community and by the time the national media got involved, a real Magglio Ordonez storm was brewing.

With all this considered, I still didn’t think Ozzie Guillen would receive any discipline. It seemed unfair and hypocritical that an American (land of the free?) organization like Major League Baseball or the Miami Marlins would suspend a Latino Manager for utilizing his free speech rights. Nothing could be more Castro-like. Nothing could be more un-American. Still the Marlins disappointed me along with many other free speech enthusiasts by suspending Ozzie Guillen for a total of five games without compensation.

So let’s get this straight. In America we hate Communist dictators. They take away people’s freedoms. That is very bad. However, in America, where free speech is paid for by the blood of our young men and women in the armed services, if you utilize your rights to free speech (no matter how unpopular such speech may be) you can be suspended or fired from your job, ostracized from society, and if you ever want to work again silenced. Did I miss something here? Do we check our free speech rights at the door when we become an employee? If so, we have made America a dictatorship of bullies and corporations which are too often one and the same.

I can only imagine Ozzie’s recent suspension being propaganda fodder in dictatorships around the world. Why wouldn’t it be with such a headline as: TODAY IN THE LAND OF THE FREE: Ozzie Guillen suspended from America’s game for utilizing “free” speech.

Thomas Jefferson once said that a successful nation should be judged on how it treats the most unpopular minority. This includes people of ethnic groups, religious creeds, and even those who have the most vile and unpopular opinions. In America we are allowed to protest military funerals with the gospel of hate, we are allowed to support the mass murdering of millions of unborn children, we are allowed to hate the President or love him like a messiah. We are allowed to burn the flag or religious books. Ozzie Guillen; however, is being punished in McCarthy-like fashion for his support of a dying socialist dictator who has become increasingly insignificant in the landscape of global politics. In today’s America McCarthy would be a hero, not a villain. He would be lauded for his gift of silencing the unpopular, for stifling those who dare move out of step or out line from the paying masses. If America is judged on how we treated Ozzie Guillen for having an “unpopular opinion” then we fail any test of greatness and serve as absolute and unquestioned proof that the land of the free has increasingly become the land of the silenced.

Jesus > Easter Bunny

Easter is a religious holiday that attracts millions of Christians world-wide to gather in celebration of the risen Jesus…and the Easter Bunny. Why is that? What does one have to do with the other? The truth is: absolutely nothing. So where is Elmer Fudd when you need him and do we need him at all: are the two compatible? How do these odd traditions develop? Where do Easter eggs come from and how about that pesky bunny who hides them everywhere while children beat each other to a bloody pulp in hopes of winning the family Easter egg hunt? Speaking of Easter, why is it called Easter anyway? We will explore these questions in greater detail and hopefully get to the bottom of the great Easter conundrum.

To find the answers one must pull back the hidden layers of the occult or maybe we should just start with the Scriptures’ Nimrod. Don’t be offended my loyal reader. I didn’t mean you. I’m talking about the Nimrod of the Bible. As the great theologian Anthony Kiedis says, “The sun may rise in the east but at least it settles in a final location.” After Noah crash landed the ark on Mt. Ararat, all of the world’s populations (like the California sun) settled in one location. Think of Nimrod as a Babylonian Lucifer (undoubtedly he had one of those Saddam Hussein moustaches they all wear over there) with a desire to be god on Earth. Nimrod was a power hungry ruler that was deeply infatuated with ruling the world. With all of the world’s citizens in one spot Nimrod was able to accomplish his wicked goal (maniacal laugh). As power hungry as Nimrod was, he found out one truth pretty quickly: you can’t take it with you and like all power hungry frogs, he croaked.
When Nimrod passed away people did what they do best and got really religious. The people deified Nimrod making him the Sun God, or as he is referred to in our Old Testament: Baal. Nimrod left behind a loving wife named Semi-Ramis (a.k.a. Ishtar); but, she wasn’t lonely for long. Death couldn't keep these two lovers apart and the rays of Nimrod’s sun impregnated Semi-Ramis) She bore a half God/half human child by the name of Tammuz (a.k.a Cupid). Tammuz (a.k.a. Cupid) is where we get the lovey dubby feel good Hallmark holiday of the year in Valentine’s Day. The truth is Tammuz was incredibly loving (wink wink) in an incestuous kind of way as he and his mother engaged in heated sexual relations until the the great Sun God in the sky called Tammuz home. Tammuz would pass away in a bizarre hunting accident (insert Dick Cheaney jokes here) where he was gored by a wild boar. To commemorate Tammuz, his people would fast and pray for 40 days. This is where the historical and modern Christian Church get the idea for 40 days of lent. It does not come from Jesus’ 40 days in the dessert as is popularly perceived. After 40 days, the people would feast on that which killed poor Tammuz: wild boar. Today, ham is Easter’s most popular dish.

Heartbroken after losing her two lovers, Semiramis (Ishtar) also eventually passes away; but, not so fast! Her husband Nimrod (now Baal) isn’t quite ready for her. Perhaps he was angry about the incest; but, that is only conjecture at this point. We will never truly know. Like a poultry-fied version of Lucifer, Baal casts Semi-Ramis down to earth in a giant egg that crash lands and explodes in the Euphrates River. The first thing Ishtar (Semi-Ramis) does is change a bird into an egg laying bunny, who we all know and love today as the Ishtar Bunny or the Easter Bunny (Easter is the Anglicization of the word Ishtar).

Now how about those pesky colored Easter eggs that always stain hands and our beautiful Sunday bests alike? The priests of Ishtar (or Semi-ramis' priests) would hold a special sunrise service the 1st Sunday after Equinox. This is where the modern Church gets its annual Easter date as Easter is always celebrated the 1st Sunday after the spring equinox. The priests of Ishtar would gather young virgins and publicly impregate them on an altar, probably while listening to Type O Negative’s October Rust. One year later these virgins would return with three month old babies, whom the priests would then sacrifice as an offering to Nimrod or Baal. They would then take Ishtar eggs and dip them in the sacrificed baby blood in order to color them. Today red is seen as the official Easter egg color. Even the White House displays red Easter eggs.

So now we know the vile history of Easter filled with a healthy dose of paganism, ignorance, and demon worship (like a Sam Raimi flick). The question remains: Is it possible to celebrate Resurrection Sunday in a way that still honors Christ. I think so. This is a gray area and different Christians are going to come up with different answers to this. Is it possible to celebrate Easter and not know any of the above? Absolutely and most people do, so don't be judgmental in this area. It’s also possible to know the above and alter the way we do Easter, calling it Resurrection Sunday and getting rid of all the silly bunny and egg metaphors. We need to grasp tightly to the central and most important reason for the holiday: the Resurrection of the same Jesus who conquered death. This Jesus serves as a physical embodiment of a God who offers hope, a hope for good, a hope for the future, and a hope that all broken things will be reconciled and made new.

To resurrect the great Joshua for a moment, as for me and my family, we are going to Elmer Fudd Ishtar, and the eggs, and the Easter Bunny. Such bizarre celebration takes our eyes off of Jesus and truthfully, as a Christ follower, I am not comfortable at all with my kids coloring eggs after we know their origins. That silliness has nothing to do with Jesus and for those of us that know Jesus, He is so much better than all of that. A genuine celebration and admiration for the Resurrection of Jesus is what we need on Resurrection Sunday, not another Hallmark holiday infused with an unhealthy dose of paganism & American consumerism. We need Jesus. We always need Jesus, nothing more and nothing less.

Jesus is and always will be greater than the Easter Bunny.