Guns, God, and Government

Nothing makes me angrier than dead children. How could something so senseless, so inhumane continue in a country that is so quick to claim its exceptionalism? That is a question I have repeatedly asked myself in the wake of yet another school shooting, this time in Oregon at Umpqua Community College (UCC Mike Huckabee, not USS). Just before the shooting, I had stumbled on a piece on student loans. In the comment section, an insane right-winger ranted about how people who can’t afford to go to “elite schools,” should simply go to “community college where the rest of the worthless burger flippers go.” As I watched the news (the news, not FauxNews), I wondered if his heart had been turned by the carnage reported by our living room gods. I wondered if he had been moved to appreciation by the heroic actions of fellow student, Chris Mintz, who took seven bullets to protect his classmates in full demonstration of what Christ said when he stated, “There is no greater love than the love of someone who lays down his life for his friends.” I wondered if the hate in his heart had been drowned out by tears, or compassion, or empathy. Then the synic in me came to the belief that he probably couldn’t hear the crying over the sound of his firearm, as he put down his copy of National Review to shoot above his head Yosemite Sam style & scream, “You can have my gun when you take it from my cold dead fingers, Obama!”

I truly felt for the President, as he made an impassioned plea to change our gun laws. He did everything short of get on his knees and beg Congress to make changes to the lax gun laws that permeate our Nation. This is the fifteenth mass shooting during his Presidency and his hands our tied, truly. He can’t do anything unless Congress acts and the more the NRA, Faux News, and the ilk brainwash the American people into believing guns are not the problem, the more unlikely it is that Congress will ever act. Even though they are owned primarily by banks, Congress are our public servants and they often sway to the beat of public opinion, as their greatest fear is not getting re-elected and then having to face the prospects of getting a real job. In a recent poll only 25% of Americans believe that stricter gun laws would do anything to prevent shooting massacres, despite the overwhelming evidence that gun control works (and works really really well) around the world. Americans against gun control, along with those silenced from fear (i.e. the Church) have become complicit in these tragedies. As we turn a blind eye and cuddle our sidepieces, people are being massacred, families are being broken, and our little ones are being raised in a country that knows no safe place. In fact, in the wake of recent shooting scandals, gun sales went up. Our moral compass is so aloof, we run the risk of mass shootings becoming an actual business model for the NRA and weapon manufacturers. The blood of the Oregon victims had not yet run dry before people took to the Internet fighting for their gun rights. In the immediate aftermath of the shooting, many showed their lack of humanity by making gun rights their primary concern. Radical conservatives argued that if schools weren’t gun free zones, this wouldn’t happen; but, UCC in Oregon wasn’t a gun free zone. Oregon is an open carry state and no college has the authority to overturn state law. John Parker, Jr. admitted to having a gun on campus during the shooting; but, wisely and with a great deal of common sense, chose not to use it out of fear that he would be mistaken for the perpetrator and shot dead by police (imagine that). Other far-right extremists argued that taking guns away wouldn’t work and that the issue was the human heart. Of course the issue is the human heart; but, these mass shootings aren’t occurring with spitballs (shout out to Zell Miller). Besides, if one really believed the issue was the human heart, why make it easier for evil people to own firearms? So many on the right are up in arms about Iran potentially owning a nuclear weapon; but, why be so terrified? Nuclear weapons don’t kill people. Evil people kill people.  Conservatives took to the Internet in masses, encouraged by brain-dead knuckleheads like Mike Huckabee and Donald Trump to say, “Criminals don’t follow laws.” What a novel argument! Why have any laws then? Why have laws against larceny, or fraud, or immigration. I seem to remember this group of people being very devoted to drug laws and using them to throw people (mostly minorities) in jail with glee; but, maybe my memory is shaken after the trauma of watching guns claim the lives of nine more people, when they should be home with their families, right now. Additionally, weapons were purchased legally for eight of the eleven mass shootings President Obama has addressed publicly. Conservatives argued that mental illness is the problem. They argued that it is anti-Christian bigotry. Yet, there is mental illness everywhere & bigotry everywhere; but, what separates America from the rest of the world is a lack of sensible gun laws that prevent this sort of nonsense. A day after an Australian mass shooting in 1996, Australians had had enough and passed sensible gun legislation that cut gun related deaths by 50%. Japan has gun control and .06 gun deaths per every 100,000 people each year. Norway has gun control and less than 2 gun deaths per 100,000 people. The UK also has gun control and has .25 per 100,000 people killed by a gun every year. The United States, with the most lax gun laws of any industrialized nation, has 10 gun deaths per 100,000 people. One study showed that more than 35,000 Americans die by the gun each year, which is more than 85 dead by the gun per day, and 3 dead by the gun every hour. By comparison, the Vietnam War cost the lives of 58,000 American soldiers over a 20 year span. Guns take American lives at more than half that rate…..every two years. Statistics show that you are much safer not having a gun in your home than you are having one. I remember a really intelligent holy man once saying something along the lines of, “He who lives by the sword (gun), will die by the sword (gun).” Speaking of holiness, there’s the other argument, “If we only let God back into schools, these events wouldn’t happen.” To which I reply, “Which God?” Should we allow Allah, or Baal, or the God of the Old Testament, or perhaps Thor to return to be our Nation's Almighty Superintendent? If disallowing God is the problem (which is a strawman by the way), then why do the most atheistic countries put us to shame when it comes to their low rates of school shootings and gun deaths?

As I held my three year old daughter after the shooting, I came to the sickening realization that there is no safe place for her in America. Schools and Churches, which are supposed to be sanctuaries, have become places of carnage and death because we love our guns more than we love the Prince of Peace who commanded us to, “Lay down our swords.” As my daughter grows up, she will likely face a country where metal detectors are everywhere and armed guards are an unwelcome reminder of our country’s infatuation with tools of murder and weapons of destruction. Each and every day we are commanded to fear “the other,” whether those are immigrants, or Muslims, or homosexuals, or  liberals. Perhaps all the fear mongering is to keep us away from seeing that “the other” fails in comparison to the beast within. When we have a country that sees families grieve over their dead loved ones and our response is, “We love our guns,” than we have most definitely become the beast.

There is still hope. There are plenty of Americans that believe in America, that believe we can progress to making America a better place, a place where children are safe to return to schools and Churches, a place where mass shootings are a sad remnant of a barbaric past, a place where guns (like the Confederate Flag) are nothing more than museum pieces, locked away with the rest of history. I long for that day when one of my grand-children, will turn to my daughter and point to a gun safely locked away in a museum and ask, “What’s that mommy?”

 

 

The Christ Candle

We make our way hand-in-hand down the stairway. The basement is dark; but, for one candle held tightly in my grip. Outside the world parades in decadence; but, here in the sanctity of our home we sing, “Come All Ye Faithful,” long after most have torn down their Christmas trees in exchange for champagne and Auld Lang Syne. This is our New Year tradition, our way of saying, “We give it all to you Lord.” My children surround me, their faces familiar; but, not as young as last year. My wife smiles, more beautiful than ever; but, her face has begun to show the wisdom of her years. My hand is shakier than it was last year and slightly more wrinkled. One year, if I am blessed with time, I will not recognize my own aged hands as I embrace the lit candle that guides us through the darkness, as I hold tightly to the Christ Candle. The children won’t be children; but, grown women with, God willing, children of their own. Jesus will never change. This is our great comfort as we make our way through the darkness, through the years. As I embrace the candle, as I embrace our family, I know full well that His hands will never grow weary, that we are all secure in His embrace forevermore. Yet tonight and every night He lets us hold Him, asking even us, to share Him with the world. I paraphrase Saint Francis, “All the darkness in the world can not compare to the light of this one single candle. Even if this room had been dark for thousands of years, the light of this candle would have penetrated the darkness causing it to retreat in wonder at the splendid array of this bountiful light.” We pray. We thank Him for everything, for the joy, for the pain, for the hardships, for gain and for loss. We embrace and talk about Jesus as if we know Him personally because we do: we know the light of the world. We are amazed at what His life and death meant for all of us. Mary held baby light in her hands that even death’s nails that pierced into the wood of the cross could not hold. We hold this light that death could not hold, we hold Christ as He holds us. In Christ, the light burns gloriously so that the world may see, so that we too may be made light. One candle lights another and another and another and this was always God’s plan. From the solitary Christ Candle we light another candle that represents each of our lives, giving our light to the world, giving all we are and all we have to Christ. We do this each and every year, hoping and praying, that we could burn as the light of the world, for all to see. This is our New Year: that light would shine, that hope would come, that out of the ashes comes resurrection: that love would win and peace would reign. This is the Gospel: that light came into the world and the darkness could not bear its glorious burden.

TWEETSOFPRAYER.COM: Bible Tweet Chain

It is often referred to as the Greatest Story of All Time. Christians refer to it as the very Word of God, inspired and God-breathed. The Bible is the greatest selling book of all time, yet many are ignorant of its power and precepts. While billions are being spent on education all over the world, many are ignorant of the only path to salvation: Jesus Christ. This is why the ministry of Bible Tweet Chain is so essential in today’s world. In an era where Twitter and text messaging reigns supreme, Bible Tweet Chain is attempting a huge endeavor of tweeting the entire Bible from person to person on Twitter. This chain, much like the wave in major sporting events is a grassroots effort that is empowered by the Holy Spirit. It’s also very easy to use. Go to www.tweetsofprayer.com and log-in with your Twitter account. Simply click the button that says, “Recite,” and the verse will be posted on your Twitter account. Now it’s up to the next Christian to post the next verse and so on and so on, until all of God’s Word is proclaimed to the Twitter-verse. The early Church passed along the Good News of the Gospel, in a similar way, by person to person from person to person. The movement was directed by the Holy Spirit and saw great success due primarily to the fact that the Word wasn’t kept secret, strangled and held tightly between a select few. Instead, the Word was a precious gift to be given freely to all people. As Christians, we tend to romanticize this early Church period often wishing to be a part of such an amazing movement for the Gospel. Bible Tweet Chain allows us to do just that by simply using our Twitter for the Gospel’s purpose. Anyone can be used by God, to serve God, and Bible Tweet Chain may just be the most practical way to share our faith on a daily basis. All Christians are called to share the Gospel. This is the Great Commission of Jesus Christ. So here’s a personal challenge: let’s share the Bible verse-by-verse together. Let’s shine light into the darkness, together. Let us, together, boldly share the Word of God. The task of the Gospel is simply, one click away.

 

For more information, please visit: www.tweetsofprayer.com  

 

 

 

 

Billy Graham Center - Wheaton, IL

To reprieve a bad day is a wonderful thing, to re-discover true joy is an even better one. Recently, I re-discovered my true joy after a visit to the Billy Graham Center Museum in Wheaton, IL, which is conveniently located within 60 minutes of the city of Chicago on the Wheaton College Campus.

Upon arriving, the first noticeable aspect of the museum was the transport to Asia. The entrance of the BGC is adorned with Japanese Christian art carefully crafted by internationally renowned artist Sadao Watanabe. Watanbe expressed his art through many colorful stencil prints and even through intricately detailed kimonos (yes, kimonos). Watanabe converted from Buddhism at the age of 17 and lived to express His love for Jesus through his own artwork.  The exhibit told the Biblical story in a refreshing new way, from an Asian perspective. The exhibit served as proof that Christ is not only for Western eyes; but, for all eyes moved to gaze upon Him and His glory.

Upon leaving the entrance area of the Billy Graham Center museum, one enters the Rotunda of Witnesses, a beautiful rounded hallway featuring giant (15 foot plus) hanging wall art of many of the early Church’s most familiar names. Each wall hanging features a quote that left me weak kneed and inspired. For example, the banner dedicated to the Apostle Paul featured the following quote, “He is the image of the unseen God and the first born of all creation, for in Him were created all things in heaven and on earth: everything visible and invisible, thrones, dominations, sovereignties, powers - all things were created through Him and for Him. Before anything was created, He existed, and He holds all things in unity.” A beautiful banner dedicated to St. Francis of Assisi hung adorned with his mightily moving words, “You are wisdom. You are peace. You are beauty. You are eternal life.” St. Francis, of course, was referring to Christ. The most touching banner featured a tribute to Martin Luther whose words were hauntingly beautiful. Luther said, “When you have Him you have all; but you have also lost all when you lose Him. Stay with Christ, although your eyes do not see Him and your reason does not grasp Him.” Other banners included in the exhibit were dedicated to; Oswald Chambers, Jonathan Edwards, Blaise Pascal, John Wycliffe, Gregory the Great, and even Justin Martyr. It should be noted that a wonderful bookmark collection featuring these banners in miniature form can be purchased through the Museum’s Gift Store. These are great to use as actual bookmarks; but, are suitable for framing as well.

As I walked through the Rotunda of Witnesses, I was brought to a darkened room where I watched a short film on the History of Evangelism in the United States. The film featured many of the names revealed in the Museum’s expansive History of Evangelism in America exhibit which was exhaustive. The exhibit featured actual items used by some of Christianity’s most notable names, such as a John Eliot Algonquin Bible circa 1663 (pictured), an actual Cotton Mather sermon, a saddlebag used by 19^th century circuit riders, an original copy of Uncle Tom’s Cabin, a Civil War Bible used by soldiers, a baseball signed by Ty Cobb (given to Billy Sunday) and so much more. The exhibit accurately depicted the struggles and sacrifices of America’s earliest evangelists. One would be hard-pressed to walk through the exhibit and not have your fervor for evangelism reignited.

The next portion of the Museum is entitled the Cross of the Millennium. When walking into the room one is drawn toward a beautiful crystal crucifix illuminating from the center of the circular shaped room. The crucifix is designed impeccably by artist Frederick Hart and features a Star of David etched into the front side of the cross. As you make your way around the room, you will be moved to see Christ's eyes following your eyes. No matter where you go, or where you are, He never takes His eyes off of you. This is true in the Cross of the Millennium section of the Billy Graham Center Museum and in our Christian walk as well.

The next section of the museum features a dedication to the life and ministry of America’s evangelist, Billy Graham. The exhibit here is astounding and leaves no stone unturned in regards to Mr. Graham's life and ministry. You will find writings from Mr. Graham dating back as early as his grade school years, a diploma from Florida Bible Institute, an extensive collection of metals and awards Graham has received, as well as letters from celebrities like Johnny Cash and Muhammad Ali. The most astounding part of the exhibit is Billy Graham’s traveling pulpit. I had the opportunity to actually stand behind the pulpit and gaze down at Billy’s actual sermon notes. This was the same pulpit and these were the same notes used to share the Gospel with millions of people. Standing behind Mr. Graham's pulpit is an emotionally humbling experience.

The final part of the Museum is a Walk Through the Gospel, where you will find yourself walking on new ground, literally, as the room you enter is an exact replica of Skull Hill, the place where Christ was crucified. You will be hard-pressed not to notice the enormous wall painting done by artist Jan Styka. The painting, which is at least 30 feet long depicts the crucifixion of our Lord. One can spend an afternoon or so examining each and every carefully placed artistic detail, all of which document the day of Christ’s brutal execution on behalf of sinner’s like me. Turn to your right and you will find a hallway shaped like a cross. You will walk down the cross-shaped hallway and gaze upon a large hanging wooden cross, which is hypnotic in its splendor. You will then approach another dark hallway (meant to resemble Christ’s tomb), with the words, “He is not here. He is risen,” written overhead. Walk just a little further and you will enter a room that literally looks like the skies of heaven. The room repeatedly plays the Handel chorus of “Hallelujah!” as you gaze about the blue skies and white clouds both above and below. This, of course, is a representation of what heaven may actually look like. The last banner; however, makes the “view of heaven,” seem small in comparison to what heaven will actually be like. The banner, which is the last you will see inside of the museum, is a reference to John’s words in Revelation that we can rest assured that the Risen Christ will personally wipe each and every tear from our eyes in a place with no more sorrow and no more pain.

The Museum also offers the opportunity to have uninterrupted moments of reflection with God, inside of a beautiful chapel. After being so inspired to re-connect and re-kindle with my greatest joy, Jesus Christ, I took the liberty to fall to my knees, praise God, and thank Him for the wonderful opportunity of walking with Him and being loved by Him, both in this life and the next. May I suggest you do the same?

Rekindle your faith and rediscover your joy. Visit The Billy Graham Center Museum as often as you’d like, as many times as it takes. The Museum is located inside the Billy Graham Center – Wheaton College Campus at 501 College Avenue, in Wheaton, IL. The museum is opened M-Sa 9:30AM-5:30PM and Sunday 1PM-5PM. Admission is FREE and donations are welcome.

 

 

Jesus > Easter Bunny

Easter is a religious holiday that attracts millions of Christians world-wide to gather in celebration of the risen Jesus…and the Easter Bunny. Why is that? What does one have to do with the other? The truth is: absolutely nothing. So where is Elmer Fudd when you need him and do we need him at all: are the two compatible? How do these odd traditions develop? Where do Easter eggs come from and how about that pesky bunny who hides them everywhere while children beat each other to a bloody pulp in hopes of winning the family Easter egg hunt? Speaking of Easter, why is it called Easter anyway? We will explore these questions in greater detail and hopefully get to the bottom of the great Easter conundrum.

To find the answers one must pull back the hidden layers of the occult or maybe we should just start with the Scriptures’ Nimrod. Don’t be offended my loyal reader. I didn’t mean you. I’m talking about the Nimrod of the Bible. As the great theologian Anthony Kiedis says, “The sun may rise in the east but at least it settles in a final location.” After Noah crash landed the ark on Mt. Ararat, all of the world’s populations (like the California sun) settled in one location. Think of Nimrod as a Babylonian Lucifer (undoubtedly he had one of those Saddam Hussein moustaches they all wear over there) with a desire to be god on Earth. Nimrod was a power hungry ruler that was deeply infatuated with ruling the world. With all of the world’s citizens in one spot Nimrod was able to accomplish his wicked goal (maniacal laugh). As power hungry as Nimrod was, he found out one truth pretty quickly: you can’t take it with you and like all power hungry frogs, he croaked.
When Nimrod passed away people did what they do best and got really religious. The people deified Nimrod making him the Sun God, or as he is referred to in our Old Testament: Baal. Nimrod left behind a loving wife named Semi-Ramis (a.k.a. Ishtar); but, she wasn’t lonely for long. Death couldn't keep these two lovers apart and the rays of Nimrod’s sun impregnated Semi-Ramis) She bore a half God/half human child by the name of Tammuz (a.k.a Cupid). Tammuz (a.k.a. Cupid) is where we get the lovey dubby feel good Hallmark holiday of the year in Valentine’s Day. The truth is Tammuz was incredibly loving (wink wink) in an incestuous kind of way as he and his mother engaged in heated sexual relations until the the great Sun God in the sky called Tammuz home. Tammuz would pass away in a bizarre hunting accident (insert Dick Cheaney jokes here) where he was gored by a wild boar. To commemorate Tammuz, his people would fast and pray for 40 days. This is where the historical and modern Christian Church get the idea for 40 days of lent. It does not come from Jesus’ 40 days in the dessert as is popularly perceived. After 40 days, the people would feast on that which killed poor Tammuz: wild boar. Today, ham is Easter’s most popular dish.

Heartbroken after losing her two lovers, Semiramis (Ishtar) also eventually passes away; but, not so fast! Her husband Nimrod (now Baal) isn’t quite ready for her. Perhaps he was angry about the incest; but, that is only conjecture at this point. We will never truly know. Like a poultry-fied version of Lucifer, Baal casts Semi-Ramis down to earth in a giant egg that crash lands and explodes in the Euphrates River. The first thing Ishtar (Semi-Ramis) does is change a bird into an egg laying bunny, who we all know and love today as the Ishtar Bunny or the Easter Bunny (Easter is the Anglicization of the word Ishtar).

Now how about those pesky colored Easter eggs that always stain hands and our beautiful Sunday bests alike? The priests of Ishtar (or Semi-ramis' priests) would hold a special sunrise service the 1st Sunday after Equinox. This is where the modern Church gets its annual Easter date as Easter is always celebrated the 1st Sunday after the spring equinox. The priests of Ishtar would gather young virgins and publicly impregate them on an altar, probably while listening to Type O Negative’s October Rust. One year later these virgins would return with three month old babies, whom the priests would then sacrifice as an offering to Nimrod or Baal. They would then take Ishtar eggs and dip them in the sacrificed baby blood in order to color them. Today red is seen as the official Easter egg color. Even the White House displays red Easter eggs.

So now we know the vile history of Easter filled with a healthy dose of paganism, ignorance, and demon worship (like a Sam Raimi flick). The question remains: Is it possible to celebrate Resurrection Sunday in a way that still honors Christ. I think so. This is a gray area and different Christians are going to come up with different answers to this. Is it possible to celebrate Easter and not know any of the above? Absolutely and most people do, so don't be judgmental in this area. It’s also possible to know the above and alter the way we do Easter, calling it Resurrection Sunday and getting rid of all the silly bunny and egg metaphors. We need to grasp tightly to the central and most important reason for the holiday: the Resurrection of the same Jesus who conquered death. This Jesus serves as a physical embodiment of a God who offers hope, a hope for good, a hope for the future, and a hope that all broken things will be reconciled and made new.

To resurrect the great Joshua for a moment, as for me and my family, we are going to Elmer Fudd Ishtar, and the eggs, and the Easter Bunny. Such bizarre celebration takes our eyes off of Jesus and truthfully, as a Christ follower, I am not comfortable at all with my kids coloring eggs after we know their origins. That silliness has nothing to do with Jesus and for those of us that know Jesus, He is so much better than all of that. A genuine celebration and admiration for the Resurrection of Jesus is what we need on Resurrection Sunday, not another Hallmark holiday infused with an unhealthy dose of paganism & American consumerism. We need Jesus. We always need Jesus, nothing more and nothing less.

Jesus is and always will be greater than the Easter Bunny.

Year's Endings and New Beginnings

We had such an amazing and sometimes tumultuous 2011, a year that may prove to be (or not to be) our last year as the Michael McClead Band. 2010 came to a close with the knowledge that our lead guitarist Paul McKinney would be leaving the group. Paul was a guitar wizard and we knew, going into 2011, that we would have to find a replacement for a very talented member of our group and that the task would not be easy. We didn’t know that we would end up losing three more members or 60% of our entire lineup. The first surprise of 2011 was that we needed to find a new drummer. Peter could no longer fulfill the schedule that was required. After Peter left we were given the unexpected news that our bassist, Robin Laninga would no longer be participating in the group as she was going to focus her time and effort in raising her (and husband Jack’s) new son J.D. This came as a complete surprise as Robin had been telling us for months that she would come back in early 2011. Jack, her husband, called me on her behalf and left a message saying she would no longer be participating in the group. We were deeply saddened over the departure of both Robin and Peter. These weren’t just band members. These were our friends, our brother and sister in Christ and we had deep rooted relationships with both of them. Robin had been in this band since we began playing live and Peter and I have had a good friendship for over ten years and have been playing together for just as long. Their departure wasn’t just an inconvenience. It deeply pained me.  It was a dark time for our group; but, Scott and I knew that we serve a God who has a plan for us and a God who provides for our needs. Scott and I came to the realization that we were it. It was just he and I: we were all that was left of the band and I had given my heart and soul toward building. On a cold, dreary, snowy night—in my van--we made the commitment to continue onward even if it meant playing acoustic only shows with just the two of us. We re-dedicated ourselves to Christ that night and to the mission we had been called for and we once again placed our group into His hands. Within a couple of days we had our drummer: Dean Jones. Dean was a friend of Scott’s from their Church in the burbs and just a beautiful down-to-earth person. I had met Dean earlier that summer and was instantly attracted to his down-to-earth demeanor and his love for Jesus and music. Scott informed me more about Dean and we knew going into this that Dean came with some baggage. Dean is a diabetic and taking care of his own physical health wasn’t one of his strong suits. He also battled with addiction for most of his life. I wanted him in the group not only for us; but, I thought it would be what Dean needed to get on the right track in his life. I felt like Dean’s heart was in the right place and we all shared a common goal—sharing the Gospel through music. Shortly after Dean arrived, we were able to secure the services of a new lead player: James Kelton. James had never played in a group before and his first several practices were filled with anxiety and shyness. I won’t lie: they were very shaky. I really didn’t know what to make of James at first and wondered whether he could truly replace Paul. One day I encouraged James to be aggressive with his playing and told him exactly where I would like him to play. Since that talk, James has been one of the best musicians I have ever played with. He has proven to be aggressive and just an animal of a guitar player. He really has been a joy to work with and by the way, he isn’t shy. It was all just an act, I think. He is one of the biggest jokers around and talks way too much lol. Shortly after James came into the group, we were blessed with Kevin Smith, who has become the most talented bass player I have ever had the privilege of playing with. Kevin is quick and can play just about anything he’s asked. He is the quintessential rock bassist. After a desolate winter where we nearly lost everyone, we now had our group. Jehovah Jireh. The Lord provides. We played two back to back shows in March, both in Wisconsin, a state that has become our second home. Rock Island Café in Neenah, WI was Dean’s first ever show with us. He had some complications onstage due to his diabetes; but, overall he played very well and I was proud of how we had quickly come together to be a tight group. We also played that day with an awesome group called Isaiah 42:10: more on them later. The very next day we played in Sheboygan at the Upper Room, one of my favorite places to play. The Upper Room is run by Mary Pfister, an older lady who is as tough as they come. She sets up everything and does almost all the work by herself. She runs sound, the cash register, the coffee and sets up the chairs. She has such an amazing love for Christ and seeing that is infectious. Mary opens the door to the entire community. Whereas a lot of Churches seem opened only to the more elite members of the community, The Upper Room attracts all of God’s children, whether they have a 401K account or not, whether they have a home or not, whether they have it all figured out or not and those are the best people in the world to fellowship with. I love the people at the Upper Room. Unfortunately, I was sick as a dog for the Upper Room show. I had caught the flu bug the night before and could hardly keep my focus. I had intense stomach pains throughout the entire show; but, it turned out to be one of my better vocal performances as I was motivated to give Christ my all through the pain. Dean was my road buddy that weekend and could not drive due to complications from diabetes. After the Upper Room show, I had to drive the entire way home with the flu. It was terrible. Once again the band played a good show. Our next show was a local one at a place called Gallery 200 in West Chicago, IL. We played with some great musicians like Gregory Morland and Jason Benefield, who were just a joy to watch and be around. Before the show, I had asked the lady in charge whether we could bring the whole band and plug in or if it should just be Scott and I acoustic. She told me that bands play there all the time. Well, needless to say our band hardly fit in the live area and when we arrived there was no one to run the P.A. system or the sound. We had to do everything and the audience (mostly older, artsy, and definitely not very welcoming to the Christian types) was very unfriendly to louder music. I thought one lady was going to physically attack me. It was a tough show; but, we did what we do and the Gospel was shared with a largely secular audience. Afterwards, James, Kevin, and I hung out at the local McDonalds and shared good fellowship over some good old fashioned Midwestern delicacies. I also bought some kids (who had run out of money) some cookies. I’m always glad when I have the opportunity to do something like that and truthfully, it really added to the evening. Our next show was at Daniel’s Den, my local hometown venue and it was disastrous. Truthfully, I don’t know how you can have a bad show at the Den. The sound, stage, and entire setup are amazing. Matt, the owner, goes out of his way to make the experience one to remember; but, Dean was really lacking in his health. He wasn’t taking care of himself eat all and the tempo to every song was off and incredibly slow. I was so angered afterwards that I debated quitting music altogether: the show was that disastrous and embarrassing. Scott and I talked and it was funny because he had the same feelings I did. We didn’t have another show for nearly a month and we really needed to sit down with Dean. I tried calling Dean and tried texting him---so did Scott; but, we didn’t hear back from him. After about three weeks, we all viewed Dean as someone we couldn’t really depend upon. We decided that we needed to move in another direction. Peter and I still kept in touch and one of his projects was heading down hill which allowed him more time to be with us. Peter and I agreed that this would be a good time for him to come back into the group. Only a few days before our next show, Dean finally made contact. I told him about our decision and he was so angry with me. He was really hurt. I was deeply saddened to make the move; but, it was a move we made for the benefit of the Gospel.  Later Dean ended up in the hospital due to depression; but, when he was there the doctors discovered that he had been abusing prescription drugs and Dean was able to get the help he needed. I’m glad for that. Later Dean admitted that his abuse of the drugs really played a negative role in his time with the band. I felt bad for Deano and really do love the guy. We took the stage of Six Flags like rock n’ roll gospel warriors and it was so hot outside. We were sweat and cotton. We played on the beach too, took our flip flops off and let the sand warm our feet. Summer had officially arrived for us and it was awesome. Peter brought a raw energy to the band that we had sorely missed and things were once again on a roll. We then played Alpine Brat Days in Loves Park, IL where James rode a children's choo choo train ride that the conductors thought he would break. I’m pretty sure he slowed the train down quite a bit. The next show was Scott and I doing a short acoustic set at Turning Point in Cambridge City, IN. I had a terrible sinus infection; but, Scott was sympathetic and as loving as a Christian brother as I have ever known. He drove us the whole way there and the whole way back. All I had to worry about was being ready to sing. The show went really well and the acoustics were such that I don’t think I really even needed a microphone. Levi Monk followed us and was just amazing—what an incredible singer and performer who should be a big star someday. We had such a great time with him, Aaron Milbourn, and all our Indiana Christian brothers and sisters. They were so generous, kind, and loving. They provided us with fellowship that we talked about for weeks. Then we played Anonapalooza, a huge show in Geneva, IL, and really brought the house down with another great full band set. The crowd was really into us. Lighters came out. Hands waved back and forth in the air. People were dancing and Jesus was getting all the glory. Our best show of the year; however, was Critical Mass put on by our good friends in Isaiah 42:10. Critical Mass is in beautiful Portage, WI which looks like God’s favorite painting. The stage and sound set up there is incredible, which shouldn’t surprise. Isaiah 42:10 runs the whole concert and they do everything at such a high level: I love those guys to death as they have become one of my very favorite groups. Isaiah also takes such good care of us and treats us much better than we deserve. We are so blessed to have people like them in our lives. I truly love their drummer Chris Smalley. He and I really hit it off well and I enjoy every second I can get with him. We were on fire for that show and really gave everything we had. Peter and I really made it a point to play well together and we were just enjoying each other’s company again, after that short departure. Shortly thereafter was the Grok show, a live radio interview with Minister Grok. That was a lot of fun and was so overjoyed to read some of the comments afterwards. It’s a blessing to hear that my testimony gave the listeners something to encourage their faith. Things were going really well for our group.Then it hit. We were back at Six Flags Great America: which are always great shows played for tons of people, most of which have never heard the Gospel before. Before the show, Scott announced that he was leaving our group and the news hit me like cannon fire. His wife, Jinette, had been offered a position as a nurse in Mississippi and my best friend (along with Peter), my guitarist, and my right hand man in the band was leaving. We played a great show; but, it was bittersweet and we would never really get our groove back until after Scott left. From that point until November, we were just going through the motions. All I could think about in those months was Scott leaving and the void that would cause us all. See Scott’s not just a normal guy. Scott is a beautiful, vibrant, hope-filled Son of the most high. He has a love, joy, and energy that everyone feeds off of and he is the most hospitable, loving person I have ever had the privilege of calling a friend. He would be deeply missed on so many levels and we all knew that he was irreplaceable. We played a lackluster Daniel’s Den show and then a bigger show called Praizapalooza in DeKalb, IL which proved to be another disappointing show. We were excited to play Praizapalooza. Our bassist, Kevin, flew all the way in from Colorado (and then flew back) just to play this show. Jenny and I were there all day and caught all the groups before us. We were having a great time. We were supposed to have a 40 minute set; but, ended up playing for only 20 minutes. Earlier on in the day, the promoter’s friends had been given 15 minute slots; but, ended up playing for 45 or 50 minutes pushing everything way off schedule. Of course, we were the band that suffered. For the short time we were onstage the crowd was great and they just popped at our melodic brand of Christian hard rock…the energy of the place just went through the roof; but, the show decided to cut us at 20 minutes and then blamed the Church who had lent them the equipment to put on the show. Yes, unfortunately, this kind of thing happens way too much in Christianity and brotherly love gets lost in the shuffle. After the show we broke bread with Scott for the last time as a band. We would play one last show with Scott. RoyalPalooza was put on by Paul Hieser, who is just an awesome brother in Christ and a great musicians and songwriter. All I could think about was Scott---my brother would soon be gone. When we came to a close I would miss him greatly; but, a part of me was relieved that the goodbye part was now over. Scott would leave and we ended up filling the rhythm guitar spot with a young musician named Josh Martinez. Josh is just awesome. He came right in and was quiet as a person; but, aggressive as a player. He added his own style and the guitar spot became Josh’s own unique role. We quickly came together to play an awesome Daniel’s Den show with our friends Isaiah 42:10 who just tore up the stage---all for Jesus. That was so much fun and just an awesome way to give my burdens to the Lord. Isaiah 42:10 knows I am a big fan and they were gracious and kind enough to dedicate a song to me onstage. I was so honored and just touched by the gesture. We closed our 2011 arm in arm in worship of a very big God who has an enormous love for his children. So, as we close 2011 and head into 2012 our group is again faced with some questions: Do we do this again? Are we really needed? Is there a spot for us in this crazy world of Gospel music? Most importantly: what does God want us to do? What does He expect from us? Right now the answer is: we truly do not know; but, we are listening for His voice. 2012 will provide the answers we are seeking.